The glamour of the kitchen

After all my hard work searching for jobs, filling out applications, and fine-tuning and handing out CVs, I find out that I can’t legally work yet. Only by the power invested in the national insurance number will I be able to work, and that number hasn’t arrived in the mail. So what’s a girl to do?

Go crazy.

Now I can truly enjoy myself without the guilt and shame of being unemployed. I can’t legally work. This is going to be great.

I can stay at the pub until closing on a Sunday night, go to a rave on Tuesday, stay up all night Wednesday playing video games, and run with ponies along the Tay river until day break. I can spend the whole day in my pyjamas and eat cereal for dinner if I like, or hitch hike across Scotland and write my travel memoirs. I can sample all the whiskies in the region and then join a travelling circus and finally parachute back to earth only when my Nino comes in.

   

The truth, I’m sorry to say, is far less glamorous.

You see, I don’t actually like staying up all night, and I do get a headache after too much drinking. I don’t actually like to play video games and don’t have a TV anyway. I despise staying in and wearing pyjamas all day, and cereal is not dinner! Hitch hiking is dangerous, especially for women, and distilleries are expensive to visit. A travelling circus would be interesting, but I don’t think there are too many of those, and I would definitely run with ponies except I don’t think there are any running free these days.

Instead of going buck wild and having all those experiences glamourised in films and novels, I’m on my way to becoming… a good housewife.

Gasp, shock, shudder! I know.

That is, all I want to do is cook and bake.

I think David knew exactly what he was doing when he bought me that cookbook. He claims he didn’t know this would lead me to greeting him each night upon his return from university with new meals and desserts. But I think he knew. He knew exactly what he was doing.

You see, there is such adventure to be had in the kitchen. Such roads to travel, such decisions to make, such uncertain outcomes to, well, come out!

When they come out well you are on Cloud 9. Taste, seasoning, satisfaction, confidence, a new country conquered!

And when it doesn’t come out well: problem-solving, crisis-management, reflection, replenishing resources. With renewed determination, you set forth once more for that oasis of flavour that one day you will reach.

So there is a hidden glamour to the so-called housewife lifestyle. If only you knew where these vapours of steam will transport you.